HOLY

One of the most controversial things about the Hot Gimmick manga is Shinogu's decision to enter a monastery to become a monk (Ref: Vol. 12, Ch. 54, Pg. 85). In seems that, in the fandom, you either loved this decision or you hated it. You understood it or you thought it was very left-field. The arguments are that it was very out-of-character (OCC), that Shinogu did not really want to become a monk, that he over-reacted - that there are other women out there. Very rarely do I see people enter the gray area on this issue and so, let me start with the following:

I understand why he chose this path and I accept it.

It is my intent to explain why Shinogu felt this was something he honestly had to do and why it was a logical decision; that this was not a "quick wrap-up" by the author, nor was it OOC for Shinogu. While I realize that people may still not be satisfied with this choice, it is my hope that they will come to accept it. Please note that some of my opinion does shine through.

Monk: It seems to me...that you are still of two minds about this.
Monk: No need to rush into it. It's a very big decision.
Monk: Why don't you free yourself of some doubts first?
Monk: Take some more time to think about it. When you are sure, you can take your vows then.

This is what is said to Shinogu in his final scene in the manga (Ref: Vol. 12, Ch. 54, Pg. 85). From this dialogue, with no other context, one would think that Shinogu approached this very half-heartedly. After all, monks are considered very perceptive people - perhaps, in the back of his mind, Shinogu did feel that last bit of hesitance.

But when you look at his facial expressions, during his final talk with Hatsumi and after, it becomes more a matter of saying goodbye - that twinge of hearing the one you love for the last time and finally accepting that they are out of your reach. His face and his tone are both quiet and tender. It is not until he is telling her not to worry about him that he finally closes his eyes. Not until he's reassuring her that he will always be her brother does his expression change to one of defeat. Why is this important? This is what the monk observes. This is what makes him believe that Shinogu is irresolute in his decision.

Shinogu: ...No. My mind is made up.
Shingou: ...That time that I couldn't make love to Hatsumi...
Shinogu: I decided this was the only way I'd be able to give her up.
Shinogu: I am sure I want to be a monk.

His face is open and honest, he is smiling gently again as he says and thinks this. It is clear that Shinogu is completely confident in his decision to take his vows. On the next page, he says that he's just worried about someone and he will contact them after he's taken his vows. If he was indecisive, would he wait until afterwards to contact them? It seems highly unlikely, given Shinogu's character.

So, we know that he is firm in his decision, but how did he reach this point?

You'll remember that Shinogu first fell in love with Hatsumi when he was six years-old (see: antiquity) and remembers the event very clearly, saying:

Shinogu: That was the first time...I knew what it meant to feel warm.

Shinogu is nineteen at the start of Hot Gimmick. That is thirteen years worth of emotion growing, changing and being suppressed. Let me stress that: thirteen years. Besides the fact that that's longer than some married couples stay together, that's over a decade of being surrounded by the person you love and being constantly reminded of why you feel that way. It's over a decade of feeling that same, strong emotion for the same person. It is only naturally that you become accustomed to that feeling. And I think this is partially what happened in Shinogu's case.

To Shinogu, Hatsumi is the one that made him love again. She gave him warmth, loved him, and helped him accept her family. She is his treasure - his magical gift from God (Ref: Vol. 11, Ch. 49, Pg. 84) and he cherishes her more than anything else, even the rest of their family.

What that all means is, Hatsumi became not only his fixation, but his ideal . To the point where he could not see himself with anyone else, nor did he want to be. He had eyes only for her, as demonstrated by his obliviousness to Asahi and his continuously surprised reactions whenever girls approached him. When you think about that kind of love and devotion, plus the length of time that it's been growing, it's easy to see Shinogu's mindset during the final volume of the series. Combine this with the constant mixed-signals from Hatsumi (i.e. the "Take Me" scene) and persistent support of people like Azusa and Kazama, it's no wonder he was in the position he fell into.

Now that's not to blame Hatsumi. After all, any fan knows she's a little on the naïve side, especially concerning Shinogu. And when she finally did figure it out - the rejections, especially the final one, were all heartfelt and apologetic. Making it all the more hard for Shinogu and making it clear to him that there was no other woman for him at that point in time or anywhere in the near future for that matter.

He's heartbroken, folks. Devastated. Thirteen years worth of love was rejected - and he was forced to watch his love with a man he didn't approve of or respect. Can you see his desperation? Is it more clear why he acted the way he did and what his mind-set was at the time? This is no overreaction, no OOC experience. This is a perfectly logical and human reaction to such a huge loss.

So why a monk?

Think way back to Volume 5 and you'll recall this:

Shinogu: Dear God, forgive me.
Shinogu: I...I'm in love with my sister.
Shinogu: I swear I'll never, ever tell anyone. I promise to keep it a secret. So please...
Shinogu: Please...please, God...please let Hatsumi...always be with me, forever and ever.
Shinogu: Please...let Hatsumi be mine alone.

He made this vow when he was young (from the image, I'd estimate about 10) and for almost a decade, Hatsumi really was all his. To Shinogu, who had made this vow so determinedly, it obviously seemed like God was holding up his side of this pact. It is when he tells her he loves her for the first time (Ref: Vol. 5, Ch. 20, Pg. 10) that things start to unravel for him. Things escalate and escalate - to the point that multiple people, including his parents, figure out his feelings.

He broke his vow.

I think this is a huge part of why he chose a monastery. It provided a way to seek forgiveness and conquer his feelings for Hatsumi. He was so devoted to one thing for so long, it's reasonable to think that devoting himself to someone else would help him to move forward. It's completely reasonable for him to draw this conclusion and it's easy to understand when you think like he does. With the help of the monastery and the monks, there's a good chance Shinogu will eventually be able to conquer his guilt (for causing Hatsumi pain), his broken-heart and his loneliness.

Thus ends my incredibly long essay.

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